Do you ever find yourself struggling in social situations? Maybe you feel unsure of what to say, or you second-guess your actions after a conversation.
This article explores the meaning of being socially awkward, the signs to look for, and practical tips to help you feel more confident in social situations.
What Does Socially Awkward Mean?
Generally, being socially awkward means feeling uneasy, self-conscious, or unsure in social settings. Although these traits can overlap, they are not the same as being introverted or shy.
Social awkwardness often comes from a lack of confidence in social skills or fear of being judged by others.
Socially awkward people might avoid eye contact, struggle to keep conversations flowing or feel overwhelmed in group settings. It is a common feeling, but it can be unpleasant if it keeps you from making friends or enjoying social interactions.
For instance, researchers found that people with social anxiety tend to focus on negative or threatening stimuli first.
The good news is that social awkwardness isn’t permanent. Many people find it hard to connect with others, but being socially awkward is not a flaw. With awareness and practice, for example, with tools like breeze, you are able to conquer these obstacles and establish relationships that are meaningful.
Signs That You Might Be Socially Awkward
Not sure if you’re socially awkward? Here are some common signs:
- Difficulty Reading Social Cues: You can miss hints like facial expressions or body language.
- Overthinking Conversations: Worrying about what to say or replaying past interactions in your mind.
- Avoiding Social Situations: Skipping events or gatherings to avoid feeling out of place.
- Feeling Anxious About Small Talk: Struggling to think of topics or feeling that conversations are forced.
- Unintentional Interruptions: Speaking out of turn or not realizing when others are trying to talk.
Why Do People Feel Socially Awkward?
Many things, like one’s character, one’s upbringing, or even anxiety, can contribute to social awkwardness. For example:
Past traumas
In most cases, it may have its roots in traumatic events, particularly those that occurred during childhood. People who have had bad experiences with other people in the past may be afraid of being rejected or judged, so they might be starting in a way that looks unnaturally and awkward.
Additionally, negative social experiences, like bullying or rejection during formative years, can contribute to heightened social anxiety and awkwardness.
Social Anxiety
According to research, social anxiety, which is a big part of being socially awkward, is strongly linked to genes. With time, it can also lead to Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD)
It’s part of your character
Extreme introversion can lead to social awkwardness. Or you might be too demanding to yourself and a perfectionist; worrying about saying the “wrong” thing can make you freeze up.
As an alternative, maybe you are just a quiet, shy person.
Additionally, personality traits such as sensitivity to sensory processing have an impact on social interactions. People who are highly sensitive to social cues may be more likely to feel anxious or overwhelmed when interacting with others because their brains process social stimuli more deeply.
5 Practical Tips to Overcome Social Awkwardness
Embrace Your Unique Traits
Many people find socially awkward traits endearing because they signal authenticity. Try to be happy with who you are instead of trying to fit in perfectly. People are more likely to connect with you when you’re genuine.
For example, if you accidentally trip over your words, don’t beat yourself up. Laugh it off and keep going. Showing that you can take yourself lightly makes you more relatable and approachable.
Start Small and Practice Regularly
Overcoming social awkwardness doesn’t happen overnight. Start with small, manageable interactions, like saying “hi” to a neighbor or asking a cashier how their day is going. The more you practice, the more confident you’ll feel.
Improve Your Active Listening Skills
Focus on truly listening when someone speaks instead of worrying about what you’ll say next. Nodding, maintaining eye contact, and repeating back key points show that you’re engaged in the conversation.
Learn Basic Conversation Starters
Small talk can feel daunting, but having a few go-to questions can help. Try asking open-ended questions like: “What’s the most exciting thing you’ve done this week?” “How did you get into [their job, hobby, or interest]?”
These questions encourage others to share, which can keep the conversation flowing naturally.
Building Confidence in Social Settings
Confidence comes with time, but there are ways to give yourself a boost in the moment:
- Adopt Positive Body Language: Stand tall, make eye contact, and smile. Even if you feel nervous, these small changes can make you appear more confident and approachable.
- Celebrate Small Wins: Did you introduce yourself to someone new or share your opinion in a group? Acknowledge and celebrate these accomplishments—they’re steps in the right direction.
When to Seek Professional Help
If social awkwardness is severely impacting your life—making it hard to maintain relationships, succeed at work, or enjoy social activities—it may be time to seek help from a therapist.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can be particularly effective in addressing social anxiety and building social skills.
You can work on your social skills and get to the bottom of your problems in a therapeutic setting that is both safe and supportive. Sometimes, understanding why you feel awkward can help you let go of self-doubt and focus on building meaningful connections.